


Afterglow

by Aural_Contraception



Series: Jenna Shepard [3]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor, Implied Sexual Content, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-05
Updated: 2015-05-05
Packaged: 2018-03-29 05:26:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3884068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aural_Contraception/pseuds/Aural_Contraception
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The afterglow of 'reach and flexibility'. The morning after is a bit more challenging than Shepard anticipated.</p>
<p>Fluff - Part of the Curiosity series - Fluff<br/>Part 3 of?<br/>[Shepard POV]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Afterglow

[Shepard POV]

Who the hell is ringing at this hour? 

Well, who ever it is, they can call back. I tug the blanket up, kick my foot, trying to catch the blanket, just as I get it, the chiming starts up again. Dammit, in my next life, pfft, next life, right. Well, if there is one, no more twenty four-seven. 

No more. I hear the chime again, I'll check it in a second, I swear, just let me lay here for a minute first, OK? Thanks. 

Mmm, I feel an arm pull me tight. Better make that two, no, three minutes, and I'll check on it. I swear I will. Thanks. Just give me a minute or two...but three would be better. Thank you.

I don't remember that last time I felt this comfortable. Just give me a couple minutes here...

And that fucking chime again.

“EDI, who the hell is calling at this ungodly hour?”

I hear a chuckle behind me. Shut up. Commander Shepard is cranky now. Things die when Commander Shepard is cranky. So, shut up, and save yourself back there.

“It is 0847 Citadel time, Commander. And, it is your door chime, not an incoming call.” Right, thanks. I knew that. OK, well thank you, EDI.

I'm not opening my eyes yet. No, I'm taking a stand here. I lean and reach for the nightstand. I know it's right around here somewhere, I start grabbing around, knocking items that aren't what I'm looking for out of the way. I hear them crash, I'm not opening my eyes yet.

“Uh, Shepard. What're you doing?” OK big guy. That rumbling noise you're making right now. It's really not helping with the eye opening thing. Quiet. I'm cranky. Don't change that yet. A-ha! Found it. 

I pop, check the clip. Full, like I thought. Slam the clip back in.

“Was that a thermal clip I just heard?” Mm-hmm. That's what you heard there, big guy. 

I told you I was cranky. No one ever believes me. Then they whine. Hey, you just shot me.

Then don't make Commander Shepard cranky. 

Good aim. Poor impulse control. Are we clear now?

I start to sit up, when the comforting arm around me, turns traitor, and grabs the gun. What the hell? 

“What the hell?” I can kill a turian. I know how. I never really had a reason before. 

The chime again. 

I glare down at him. He has the temerity to look amused right now. “You do know I'm cranky right now. You know that, right?” Poking him in the chest. 

“Uh-huh” He nods, why is his head still on the pillow? Right, because he doesn't have a twenty-four seven life. Asshole. Traitor. He yawns, then. “Just out of curiosity, what were you planning?” He reaches for me with his other arm.

I don't think so, and smack his arm. He is still amused. I hold out my hand. “My gun, please.”

“No.” Then he grins. Did he just say no? And then grin?

This day has gone downhill fast. I was very, very comfortable two minutes ago. Now, it seems like I've slept with Benedict Arnold. 

“What were you going to do?” He asks as I reach for my gun back.

“Nothing, why? Fucking traitor.” Shit. Where did he … OK. Fine. I can play too. I reach over, run my hand over his waist. “Where's my gun. I just need it for one second. You can even have it back. Just need it for a quick sec, that's all.”

He grabs my hand. “Then, we can go back to sleep.” I add, trying to get my arm free.

He chuckles, and asks.”Why?” Did he just laugh? He did not laugh at me. I AM CRANKY RIGHT NOW, VAKARIAN. It's not a good idea to-.

The chime again. 

I whip my other arm towards the door. “THAT.”

He just looks at me. Those fucking traitor eyes still amused. “That. What?” He says. Oh don't think I didn't hear that little rumble flange you added there, Vakarian. I heard it. And … well … let's just say …. that might be a little part … no a large part of why you're still alive. Now,

“Give me my fucking gun. I will make that noise go bye-bye, and we can go back to sleep.” Simple. Gun please, hold out my hand. “Or not sleep ...” Wagging my eyebrows. I can sleep with the enemy if I have to. Or want to.

He nods toward the nightstand. “You know you can hit a button over there, and just ask what they want, right?” Smiling even more. 

He lifts a brow plate.

 

Right. 

 

Don't rush me.

 

I'm thinking about it.

 

I mean, that could also work.

 

Biting my bottom lip, it's not a bad plan actually.

 

It would be quieter.

 

I don't have to fill out a work order.

 

I don't have to explain anything to Miranda.

 

I can't remember if discharging a weapon triggers an alarm or not.

 

But, let's say it does trigger an alarm. Shouldn't that be covered by the 'it would be quieter' part of the plan? 

 

Then there is also the little problem of ricochet's. 

 

Nah, that's doable.

 

NO. I want my gun. Need to set a precedent.

 

I hold out my hand. “Gun, please. Command decision.”

Stunned. I am stunned, as he reaches behind and past me, and hits the speaker button. You are so dead. Slowly, you will die traitor, slowly.

“Good morning, Commander. I hope I didn't wake you.” Squawks the speaker. Well, you did. Now take evasive action. As soon as I can get my gun from … my locker. HA!

“Gardener?” Whispers my used-to-be favorite turian. 

He's right. It does sound like Gardener. What. Why?

“Uh. How can I help you Mess Sergeant?” I don't think I sound like cranky Commander.

“Maybe he's bringing us breakfast in bed?” Yeah, well even if he did. You're not getting yours. Smirking fucking traitor. You're damn lucky I don't have time to run to my locker.

I lean over him. “Just shut up, you.” I pull the sheet up over me, hit him, just because. Then cover that smirk with my pillow. Then punch the pillow. He should be more supportive when I'm cranky. And another in the arm. See the cranky part for why.

Asshole.

I hit the door control, and it hisses open. Gardener stands in the doorway, I wave him in.

“What can I help you with, Gardener?” I smile. Hopefully, a nice one.

“Good morning. Sorry to wake you. I just need to check your plumbing in the shower.” What? I'm sorry, what?

“Say again?” I ask, popping the pillow real quick as Gardener turns to point to the shower wall. Don't think I didn't hear you under there, Vakarian. Your lifespan is getting shorter already, don't push it.

“Uh, yes Ma'am. We, well actually EDI, received a few complaints saying there was a lot of banging coming from your shower last night. I figured the pipes must've come loose during a relay or something.” It would be a something, Gardener.

He's just looking at me. I'm counting the number of body bags I'm going to need. 

“Was this a bad time, Ma'am?” He looks sincere. I'm sure he is. It's why I'm not adding him to the list. 

Garrus pokes me under the sheets.

“Uh, no. Gardener, not at all. I thought I'd given everyone seventy-two hours shore leave.” Hence the soon to be dead turian laying next to me. The laughing one. 

“You did Ma'am. Just wanted to take care of this before I took off, that's all. I like my in-box empty, if you know what I mean, Ma'am. ” See, Vakarian. Someone does their job. Bet he'd give me my gun. I kick him in the shin.

Oh. Mother fucking son of a fucking bitch! I think I broke a toe. Oh holy fuck, that hurts. Well, that's just fucking great. Other than a catcher, who the fuck has plating on their fucking shins. Oh, shit that really fucking hurts. 

“Are you OK, Ma'am?” Ungh, yes. Will be. Thought I hid that. Sorry. Can you go to my locker for me while you're here? Anything you can grab for me in there will be fine, thank you. Oh, fuck that hurts. And don't think I can't hear you under there. 

“Mm-Hmm. Fine. Thank you. Peachy.” Through gritted teeth. He turns to look at the fish. 

Pop. Pop. Oomph. Good. 

Two quick hits to the pillow. Now, I have a smile.

“Uh, no. I haven't heard anything Gardener. But. I did get a little pissed when I tried to adjust the shower head. And It, uh, fell off the wall. I kinda threw it around a little.” Not even close to the truth. Last night, way back when the turian was still my friend, he was doing all these wonderful things, and I kind of pulled it off the wall. 

It's his fault. Not mine.

And again, Garrus pokes me under the sheets.

“It's Cerberus's fault.” I add. He looks at me confused. 

Nodding. “They should've built it better. And, they know how tall I am. It should be lower. Or easily adjustable. I shouldn't have to jump.”  
My argument is sound. Checkmate.

“Uh, you did know that the wall assembly moves up and down. That's what the lever at the bottom is for.”

 

I knew that.

 

I know. I can hear him.

“Gardener, head out. Hit the town, enjoy yourself. You've earned it, get out of here. OK. Go on, scram. Take a hike.” I wave him out. I have to say, for someone that voluntarily signed up with Cerberus, Gardener is an honorable person.

“How about I fix the shower head, then make you breakfast Ma'am.” Gardener nods toward the bathroom. I really just want him to leave. But, having a private shower. Well, that's one perk I'm not turning away. 

I sigh. “Really, Gardener? I mean ...” Trailing off. I'm not sure what to say. Sure, I want my shower back. I also want him the hell out of here. I have a turian to maim. 

And figure out who the hell sent Gardener up here. 

He heads to the bathroom, I just shrug. As soon as he's in there, I grab the pillow over Garrus's head, lean into him. “Hey. Who do you-” He grabs my head and pulls me down for a kiss. Which works better if both parties are involved. 

“You know. You're cute, when you're angry.” He rumbles. Lucky thing too. That little sub-harmonic thing does wonder- “Wait. Did you say I was cute?” Looking him in the eyes.

Grinning and nodding. “Yes. You're adorable when you're mad.” Adorable? Cute? 

“I swear, you're going to die a-” He did it again. Added a hand to the thigh also. 

“I am going to wipe-” Mmmph. That fucking bastard. Un-fucking-believable. 

Smug bastard laughs when I hit him. As soon as Gardener leaves, I am going to my locker, and whatever weapon I pull out, is what he gets it with. Even if it's the Cain. 

“What the hell do you think-” Ha. Ready for him this time. I grabbed his forearm, the one I'm wrestling with right now.

“You are really pissing me off.” I growl at him. Still struggling with his arm.

“And yet, you keep coming back.” He sounds like a smirk. How does he sound like a smirk?

“I am trying to keep my voice down you arrogant-” Mmmph. Shit. Forgot about the other hand.

“OK. Commander. I'm just about done. Did you ...” I fly back up. Pull the sheet back up, throw the pillow back over does-not-realize-how-close-to-death-he-is Garrus. As an added measure, I put my hand on the pillow, and let my weight bear down on it.

Trying to blow the hair out of my face, as Gardener steps out, standing at the top of the steps.

“So?” He asks. So? So what? What the hell did I miss now? That goddamn turian. 

Shit. Now what the hell is doing down there? 

Oh you sneaky fucking bastard. I will blow us all up to get you back. I swear.

Shit. Gardener's looking at me expectantly, for what, uh, not real sure. My mind is working on trying to stop that sneaky evil genius under the covers. 

He knows I can't get him back. He's moved one hand to my inner thigh, and his foreheads on my hip bone. Resonating those evil fucking subharmonics through me. Those evil … deep breath.

Dammit. I mean I can get him back, but only if we fess up. And groundhog turian knows I won't do that. I will kill him later, though. I'll jump him first. I'm not stupid. I'll jump him. Then kill him. 

No. I'll jump him. Wound him. Then jump him again. I like that one better. OK, that's the plan. Kneecap him? No. Need the legs. Shit. Where the hell do I wound him then? A few ribs? Maybe. I'll have to check on-

“Commander. Have you decided?” Huh? Decided what? No, I'm still working on it. Oh,wait. He doesn't mean the same thing.

“I'm sorry. Decide what?” Big Commander Diplomat Shepard smile. Followed by a gasp.

“What you wanted-” He stops as I pop the pillow hard. I'm trying to get groundhog to move his hand back. He went right for the kill on that move. Sent a few shock-waves through me. That's all.

I look up at Gardener, flex my arm. “Sorry. My cybernetics misfire sometimes. I'll have Miranda look at it later.” He nods. No. He's not buying it. 

Well. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

I can airlock everyone if I have to. We're getting close to that.

“I'm sorry. What were you saying before?” One wrong move, Vakarian. And I will … I will ... He's not making any wrong moves though. All the right ones. Shit. Exhale.

“I just wanted to know what you want for breakfast?” Shit. Deep breath. Don't you dare stop, you magnificent evil bastard. 

“Just, um, go on, hit the town. Take your, …. shore leave.” NOW. “Don't worry about breakfast. Seriously.” Somebody's working on that right now, thank you. I'm still going to kill him. It's just a stay of execution is all. 

“It's not a problem, Ma'am.” You know. Yeah, no, I can't think of any lesson in command or N7 school that covers a situation like this. I'll double-check later, but I'd bet money, I'm on my own on this one. 

“OK. Can I have an old fashioned american breakfast? Please.” He seems quite pleased by that request. Cool. Then I can get back to killing the turian. Well, in a bit. He's still dying, just narrowing down the reason right now.

“Very good. And for Officer Vakarian?” 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I'm sorry. What?”

“What would Garrus like for breakfast?” I'm not answering that. No. Nope. I can't. It's too easy. I can't do it. No. Deep breath. I can feel him laughing. I'm sorry, no. I can't. No. No. No.

And the Oscar goes to. “When I see Officer Vakarian, I will ask him.” I would first like to thank my mom, then, of course, my agent...

“But. If I were to guess, I think tepid water would be, OW, fine.” I tried to add. One dead burrowing turian coming up. Asshole.

“Oh, uh, OK, Commander. How about I just make him the usual. Aannd if you see him, you'll let him know?” He nods, and turns toward the door.

“Gardener.” He stops. “I'm serious. Just water for him.” Trying to knee Garrus. “But, OW ... cough ...thank you though.” He shakes his head and leaves.

Tapping my fingers, waiting for the door to close.

“YOU” We both say at the same time. 

Then I see it.

“Uh. Is there any particular reason, that you couldn't have told me that YOUR FEET WERE STICKING OUT?” I start pounding on him. You fucking bastard. You smug … he's laughing. Fucking laughing. I can't ....

Laughing, he says. “I tried.” 

“You tried? You tried? Where was I, when you TRIED?” He won't stop laughing. He rolls left, trying to avoid me. I swing, he rolls ...

A-HA! Found it!

 

 

“EDI”

“Yes, Jeff.”

“Do you hear gunshots?”

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This started out as the epilogue for Jack's story, and took on a life of it's own.  
> So, it became a separate story.  
> This may be the last of this series.  
> Thanks again, and please R&R.  
> 


End file.
